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Musings on monogamy

Posted by marriedflirt on 2006.06.14 at 15:44
Sometimes I wonder if I settled for something too conventional on the whole marriage/monogamy thing.

We just sold two houses to a married couple who don't live together.

I know another couple who have the same thing going on: They each have a kid from different marriages, and two separate houses. They only "sleep-over" when they are having sex. And apparently the sex is awesome.

The other day I wanted to ask my hubby a question: would he ever be into letting me make out with another man (not actual sex) if the result of that was I wanted to have sex with HIM more. Because after 13 years together, you tend not to have sex as much, which is fine. I love my husband. I love that one of us could be a quadraplegic and we'd still totally want to be together. But I was just thinking about what kinds of things might help "jump start" my inner sexual energy beyond just flirting. I mean, flirting works, but a lot of times you are hampered by the fact that you can't really DO anything with the other person and I hate coming off as a total tease.

I didn't ask him though, becuase I already know the answer: NO WAY IN HELL. He's very sensitive about cheating. For years he had nightmares about me cheating on him. Reading this journal you probably can imagine why. I would never though. It IS in my nature to do it, but, not counting the fact that it would KILL me to hurt him, I also consider being faithful to my man as part of my spiritual journey in this lifetime. Luckily I believe in reincarnation, because I am hoping that if I'm very good in this life, in my next life I'm going to get to have a TON of AWESOME SEX with lots of different beautiful men with zero guilt or diseases!

Oh, and don't ask about if he might be into or okay with watching or having a threesome. Neither of us are into that. I had too many situations in my life where I was asked to be the "guest artist" and it's never ended up being a good thing for the couple. I always refused, mind you, but even the act of asking created jealousy and weirdness--I can only imagine what would happen if I actually went through with it. And I can tell you right now that I would not enjoy watching my man sleep with another woman. The thought sort of makes me ill.

So I guess I'll just have to stick with flirting, which I have had zero time for in the past 2 weeks. Flirting takes energy and effort! Sometimes I'm just too tired to deal with it. I've kind of half heartedly tried to get the attention of a boy in the play I am in. I say boy, becuase he actually is still in high school. If I was ever actually with him I think I could be arrested. But he is SOOOO cute. I want him to want me. The "older woman". (Hey I can still pass for 25 so it's not THAT much of a stretch!) I have had a few positive signs. He's attempted to speak with me. Of course what do I have to say to a high schooler? We are in totally different worlds. The guy in the play who is actually my romantic lead has been growing on me a little too. He's not really cute at all, but he's an awesome actor and we really click together on stage. I guess I'm starting to feel some stage love for him. Good acting is a powerful aphrodisiac.


(Deleted comment)
marriedflirt at 2006-07-07 01:31 (UTC) (Link)
I've found one of the best ways to flirt and get someones attention is just to smile alot. That's it. And you don't even have to smile at THEM. Just be a generally smiley-happy-having-an-awesome-time looking person and people gravitate towards you. This was a big revelation because for years I was doing the "haughty bitch" thing. Uh, guess what? That didn't work worth a damn!
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